5 Top Avoidance Tips For Leaders

You made it! You are at the top of the heap, a newly minted Manager/Director/VP or CEO – congratulations!! You are now 1-2 actions away from becoming a jerk. As we rise, all the accolades of our once friends, and also our family, quickly pull us back to the middle through rumors, back-channels, or back-stabbing conversations. We don’t like the Crimson Tide, Yankees, or Celtics because they win too much. They try to be better than everybody else. That is also why we pull for Gonzaga, Xavier, and the Cubs – we pull for the underdog, because we don’t want to leave anyone behind – otherwise we look bad, or others think we’re trying to be better than everybody else.

To be fair, some of us do – some people who aspire to be CEOs can’t wait to say they think they are better than everybody else. Hollywood would have us believe that the hard-nosed bully bosses, like Jack Donaghy from 30 Rock, these eat-the-weak-for-breakfast-types, are as powerful as ever. Donald Trump maybe powerful and an achiever – but he is not a leader. In title only is he considered a leader. Actually he is a great achiever (self-based) and less a leader (others-based).

In our companies, how does this all stack-up? Travis Bradberry recently summarized key findings about EQ by job title from TalentSmart research.

 

 

Middle managers stand out with the highest EQ scores in the workplace because companies tend to promote people into these positions who are level-headed and good with people. The assumption here is that a manager with a high EQ is someone for whom people will want to work. Things change drastically as you move beyond middle management.

Even though CEOs have the lowest EQ scores in the workplace, the best-performing CEOs are those with the highest EQs. You might get promoted with a low EQ, but you won’t outshine your high-EQ competition in your new role. The higher you go above middle management, the more companies focus on metrics to make hiring and promotion decisions. While these short-term, bottom-line indicators are important, it’s shortsighted to make someone a senior leader because of recent monetary achievements. Possibly worse than metrics, companies also promote leaders for their knowledge and tenure, rather than their skill in inspiring others to excel.

Once leaders get promoted they enter an environment that tends to erode their emotional intelligence. They spend less time in meaningful interactions with their staff and lose sight of how their emotional states impact those around them. It’s so easy to get out of touch that leaders’ EQ levels sink further. It truly is lonely at the top.

Here are some EQ-boosting strategies for leaders. They apply to anyone, so give them a try, even if you’re not a leader (yet):

1. Stop the negative self-talk
The more we ruminate on negative thoughts, the more power we give them. Most of our negative thoughts are just that—thoughts, not facts. When you find yourself believing the negative and pessimistic things your inner voice says, it’s time to stop and write them down. Literally stop what you’re doing and write down what you’re thinking. Once you’ve taken a moment to slow down the negative momentum of your thoughts, you will be more rational and clear-headed in evaluating their veracity.

2. Acknowledge other people’s feelings
Assertive, action-oriented executives tend to marginalize employees or “fix” them so that they don’t get in the way of action. It can described as a “power problem.” People who fail to acknowledge other people’s feelings fail to realize that lingering emotions inhibit effective action

3. When you care, show it
This might be the easiest thing you can do—as long as you actually do it. Good leaders always notice when people on their teams are doing good work, but they don’t often show it. When you appreciate something that another person does, let him or her know about it. Even a quick email or pat on the back goes a long way in this regard. There are people who do great work around you every day. Don’t put off letting them know how you feel about it. Your praise will build fierce loyalty and inspire your people to work even harder.

4. Don’t let emotions rule decisions
The techniques above are extremely effective, but both require an awareness of your own emotions in the moment. The average executive, has as low self-awareness skills. They don’t necessarily “understand how their emotions impact others” and “recognize the role they have played in creating difficult circumstances.” In other words, you would become a much more effective leader if you obtained a better understanding of what you feel, when you feel it. The goal is to slow yourself down and take in all that is in front of you, so that you can understand how your emotions influence your decisions and behavior.

5. Sleep
During sleep, our brain literally recharges, shuffling through the day’s memories and storing or discarding them (which causes dreams), so that we wake up alert and clear-headed. Self-control, attention, and memory are all reduced when we don’t get enough—or the right kind—of sleep. Sleep deprivation also raises stress hormone levels on its own, even without a stressor present. The pressure that leaders are under often makes us feel as if they don’t have time to sleep, but not taking the time to get a decent night’s sleep is often the one thing keeping us from getting things under control.

Best results are from better workers – engage them through engaging ourselves.

Jim

38 Comments
  1. Finasteride Can I Purchase Achats Levitra Pas Cher viagra Vigra For Men

  2. New Keflex Oral Antibiotic generic cialis canada Buy Outdated Promethazine Codeine Syrup

  3. 20 Mg Nolvadex Pct Levitra Presentacion cialis online Orlistat Availabilty? Prezzo Viagra Farmacia Order Legally Bentyl Medicine Us Amex

  4. Bayer Levitra viagra Star Pharmacy Nogales Mexico Digoxin On Line Ph Of Amoxicillin

  5. Cialis En Turquie Adverse Reations To Amoxicillin How To Buy Priligy generic cialis from india Propecia While On Vitamin A Cipro V Amoxicillin Generic Viagra Sample Pack

  6. Thanks for your ideas. One thing I’ve noticed is that banks plus financial institutions know the spending routines of consumers while also understand that most people max out and about their cards around the getaways. They properly take advantage of this kind of fact and then start flooding your inbox and also snail-mail box together with hundreds of Zero APR card offers soon after the holiday season concludes. Knowing that should you be like 98 in the American public, you’ll jump at the possiblity to consolidate card debt and move balances for 0 APR credit cards.

  7. Zithromax Order Canada Buy Kamagra 100mg cialis 5 mg best price usa Koflet Propecia Erfolg Achat Cialis Soft Quel Site

  8. Hmm is anyone else having problems with the pictures on this blog loading? I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

  9. Hello there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? There’s a lot of people that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Thanks

  10. I really like your writing style, wonderful info , regards for posting : D.

  11. some truly great information, Glad I detected this.

  12. Appreciate it for helping out, superb information.

  13. Thanks for the marvelous posting! I certainly enjoyed reading it, you will be a great author.I will make certain to bookmark your blog and will come back very soon. I want to encourage you to ultimately continue your great job, have a nice morning!

  14. Levaquin Best Website In Internet cialis Tadalafil Tablets India

  15. Hello, tender thanks you in regard to tidings! I repost in Facebook

  16. Hello, recognition you for information! viagra in action http://viapwronline.com I repost in Facebook.
    viagra coupon

  17. Hello, show one’s gratitude you http://cialisxtl.com looking in compensation tidings! cialis generic
    real viagra without a doctor prescription

  18. Buy Tadacip Canada Generiques Medicament Cialis Buy Cialis Prix Cialis Ou Peut On Acheter Du Propecia Comment Acheter Du Cytotec

  19. Cialis generic cialis bitcoin cialis vs viagra effectiveness

  20. Priligy Authentic п»їcialis Cephorum Animal Tablets For Sale Mejor Cialis Espana Amoxicillin Recommended Dosage

  21. Cialis Pas Cher Paypal Viagra Pills For Cheap Propranolol Online No Prescription cialis 5mg Controindicazioni Per Il Cialis Propecia Effects On Women Indicated

  22. Doxycycline Delivered Cheap Xenical Tablets Levitra Generique Avion Cialis Can I Buy Doxycycline Over The Counter Propecia Heart Problems Buy Online Viagra Pfizer From Pakistan

  23. Cialis does cialis lower your blood pressure how does cialis work

  24. Cialis where to get cialis sample current cost of cialis 5mg cvs

  25. Loving the information on this internet site, you have done outstanding job on the posts.

  26. Hey would you mind letting me know which hosting company you’re working with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker then most. Can you suggest a good web hosting provider at a fair price? Thanks, I appreciate it!

  27. order viagra canada pharmacy how much does cialis cost at walmart mail order viagra canada

  28. Good day! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering if you knew where I could get a captcha plugin for my comment form? I’m using the same blog platform as yours and I’m having trouble finding one? Thanks a lot!

  29. buy viagra queensland best place to buy cialis uk cialis fake pills

  30. We stumbled over here different web page and thought I may as well check things out. I like what I see so now i am following you. Look forward to going over your web page for a second time.

  31. buy cheap generic cialis online buy viagra online in the uk is it legal to order cialis online

  32. Admiring the hard work you put into your blog and in depth information you provide. It’s nice to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same outdated rehashed material. Fantastic read! I’ve bookmarked your site and I’m adding your RSS feeds to my Google account.

  33. I just added this blog to my rss reader, great stuff. Cannot get enough!

  34. how to buy viagra online in canada how to take cialis cialis manufacturer coupon 2019

  35. Quando você tiver encontrado o programa para você, é hora de começar o trabalho duro. Isto inclui construir uma base de clientes, e depois chegar a um público mais vasto.

  36. cheap viagra in the uk high blood pressure and cialis buy cheap viagra blog

  37. buy viagra east london cialis coupons 2019 levitra buy online no prescription

Leave a Reply